Monday, March 28, 2016

Let's Talk - Moms

 Today Erika and I are hosting our monthly "Let's Talk" Linkup and the topic of choice.... moms! 

I feel like I kind of  hit the mom jackpot.  


My mom is pretty much the best.  I'm still a little bitter that she would never buy me Abercrombie jeans and she used to make me eat steamed baby carrots, but I'm almost over it.  Almost.


Despite the off brand jeans and mushy carrots my mom is pretty awesome.  She's honest, tell-it-like-it-is and super smart and today I thought I'd highlight a few of the things that I think make her pretty awesome.

Number One - She's always encouraged me to be myself and taught me that being myself is "enough".

Whether it was buying me tights to wear under my camp shorts and slouch socks, letting me paint my white Keds with neon puffy paint or making me a globe costume for Halloween, she has always encouraged me to be myself.  When I found old name patches at a flea market and had the idea to sew them all onto a denim jacket, she would buy me the thread and help me stitch.  I wanted to sponge paint my room, why not.  

Allowing me the freedom to develop my own tastes and interests helped me find the confidence to know that I am "enough" exactly as I am.  Doing something just because everyone else is doing it is a pretty dumb reason ;)  What's the coolest thing to be?  Not a copy of anyone else, but yourself.  




Number Two - She's always trusted me.
Lots of my friends growing up always felt like it was them vs. their parents.  They would find ways around rules, hide things from their parents and push the limits.  I never felt this need - because my mom always trusted me.  I remember a conversation during early adolescence where she told me that since I had never given her a reason not to trust me, she would be doing just that - trusting me.  Unless I gave her a reason NOT to trust me, the trust would remain in tact and I would get the privileges that went along with that trust.  My mom and I maintained a great relationship through my teenage years, and I feel like her giving me that trust (and me not wanting to lose it) was a big part of that.


Number Three - She Knows Everything
I've tried to deny this on multiple occasions and have always been proven wrong :)  If my mom tells you that she'll bet money on something, you'd better back out of the offer.

How long to bake something?  She knows.
Do you think it's just a cold or something more?  She knows.
Does this look normal?  She knows.

But she also knows exactly when to keep her opinions to herself  and let me make my own calls on things.  


Number Four - She leads by example
For as long as I can remember, she's led by example.  There's nothing that she asks of me that she's not doing herself.  She was ALWAYS reading, learning and engaging in Bible studies and while we were growing up, was involved in TONS of service organizations and projects.  I've watched her love on her friends as well as strangers and credit that example for my a lot of my views on serving others.  She's also a prayer WARRIOR!  If Joyce Buchanan prays for you, it's a good one ;)  She covers my entire family in prayer every day and has notes and stickies throughout her Bible with verses that she's prayed over and for us throughout our lives.


Number Five - She taught me about simple pleasures
She taught me that things don't have to be big or flashy to be awesome.  As kids, she always helped us find the fun in little things.  She'd hang butcher paper on the wall and let us paint, would buy us dress-up clothes at the thrift store to encourage imaginative play and provided us endless opportunities to be creative and explore.  She would pause and take time to engage and teach in the little moments and I credit a lot of the things I do with my own kids to her.


Number Six - She didn't fight my fights for me.
In the third grade I came home devastated about a low A on a history test (yes, I was that girl).  I had interpreted a question in a way where I felt my answer was correct and she agreed with me.  BUT, she said it was my test and not hers and told me that if I felt I was right that I needed to bring it to the teacher.  It took me a full week to muster the courage to broach the subject with Mrs.Walser, but I did it... on my own... and she gave me the points :)   My mom rarely stepped in on my behalf and I learned tact and confidence by her giving me the opportunity to speak for myself. 


Number Seven - She tells it like it is
Even when it's not what I want to hear my mom tells it like it is.  :)  I don't always love her honesty, but who else is going to tell me I'm over reacting, being a little crazy and/or need to slow down.  She's logical and rarely reactive.  She plays a great devil's advocate and often helps me see things from a different perspective.


Now, don't get me wrong.  My mom and I have our fair share of words.  We bicker, typically on the phone in the mornings when I'm not quite "preheated" yet. She's usually trying to talk some perspective into my morning and I'm wanting to vent about how Mason "WOULDN'T PUT HIS FREAKING PANTS ON!!!" and I snap at her.  Or, I'm whining about something rude someone said and her "who the heck cares what so and so says" comment is a little too logical for 6:45 a.m. 

But, we always make up.  Even if we agree to disagree, we hash it out.

I thank God every day for my mom and that my kids get to grow up with her in their daily lives. I can only hope that my kids grow up and think of me as fondly as I think of her :)

Enough sappy from me... now it's your turn!  Link up and let's talk moms!!!

   
   

30 comments :

  1. I love your mom. I've admired and adored her for years, and she's always been such a good example to me too!

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  2. Your mama is so great!! I love me some Joyce!! :) Loved this post so much, Andrea!! Xoxo

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  3. She does sound amazing! I was reading this and so hoping my kids my say some of the same things about me. Being free to be my own person was definitely one of the hugest things my mom did. And holy moly...I knew your kids looked like you but seeing your baby pics...wow!! Have a super day Andrea and thanks for hosting.

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    1. Right?!?! I can only hope that my kids think of highly of me as I do of my mom. And yes... the resemblance is strong! hahaha

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  4. Well, your mama needs to print this out and frame it in a shadow box! What a wonderful tribute!

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  5. My mom always said the same thing to me, I trust you until you give me a reason not to. That has stuck with me throughout my life.

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  6. Totally agree with the Number two about Trust, that's how I raised my girls and we made it through the teen years in good shape!!

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    1. Yes! I am NOT looking forward to the teen years, but am putting this one in my back pocket for reference :)

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  7. Great post! I love the picture of you & your mom in the yellow outfits. Your mom's hair is on point! It totally looks like a poster from the beauty shop in 1987! Love it!

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  8. Ummmm I love this post! I am also blessed to the core with a wonderful mom. She keeps my kids, cleans my house, keeps the peace around here, and still gets me Easter goodies at age 27. Most importantly she prays for me!

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  9. So sweet! I feel my relationship with my mom is just about the same. My parents live next door to me and my hubby and kids and we see them everyday and eat dinner with them a lot. Such a sweet tribute!

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    1. Love that! I didn't grow up with grandparents as part of my daily life, and I am so excited my kids get to! We're blessed!

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  10. You are blessed. I've tried to be that kind of mom to my kids but did not have that growing up. I was never encouraged to be myself. I still struggle with many "mom issues" today due to her controlling ways. Everything had to be her way and was and still is very vocal with her opinion on things. Give your mom an extra hug today for being so awesome!

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    1. Oh, girl! Thank you so much for your comment. Sometimes it's easy to forget that not everyone grew up with a mom like mine so thank you for the little bit of perspective. I'm so sorry to hear about your mom, but good for you for learning from that and being the best mom for your kids. Hope you have a wonderful week!

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  11. i love your mom. i'm going to read your beautiful words again and take some of what you've shared and incorporate them into myself! i love learning from others. i don't have a great mom. i promised myself i would be the best mom ever and i honestly believe my kids would agree that i'm a great mom. i want to be the best grandma ever and after four years i think i'm doing pretty well! i've taken care of kinleigh every weekday since she was four weeks old while her mom works. it's the most gigantic blessing ever. i makes my heart burst every day!

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